Slow Down

Slow down

Don’t skip to the end

Take a breath

Do not fear

Make plans

Do not stress

Plans fall apart

But that is ok

Live in the present

Put the past behind

Don’t worry about the future

It will be all ok

Jo Anne Kennedy

August 2019

Scrambled

I am tossed

I am tangled

Not sure which way is up

My brain is busy

My heart is heavy

Am I inside or out

So man emotions

Entangled with my thoughts

I am going stir crazy

Is it wrong?

Or is it right?

What is the lay of the land?

I am confused

My head is scrambled

Like eggs on a plate

What do I do?

Nothing is the answer

Am sure this will go away

The voices in my head,

Are arguing with each other

Please give me peace

Jo Anne Kennedy

August 2019

Am I Wrong?

My mind is so active

So many thoughts

Many of them destructive

Then I think of you

And guilt starts to rise

I should have acknowledged you

But guilt is wrong

As I should feel no shame

I am standing my ground

I wonder though, am I wrong?

Because it brings out fear

Fear of being ignored

But I need to remember

That it doesn’t matter

And I should not care

I will live my own life

I don’t need your selfishness

Clogging up my space

Jo Anne Kennedy

August 2019

Flitting

I go from one world to another

Flitting between place

Not content in one area

I meet many other people

All who have a different story

One I am eager to know

I help catch a killer

I roam the streets of London

And I help break the chain

I walk from town to town

Immersing myself in the surroundings

Getting lost in the scenery

It is an educational experience

I have so much to learn

In every place I go

When I finally get home

I tell others all about,

The wonderful places I have been

Then they can follow after me

And enjoy the wonderful experience

Of being lost in another world

Jo Anne Kennedy

July 2019

Words You Say

You may not realise

But the words you say

DO HURT

You may think you are funny

But actually the truth is

You are not

You are hurtful

The words are spiteful

They are like verbal darts

You throw them out

And manage to hit bullseye

And the words hurt the heart

You think you aren’t mean

But I beg to differ

Due to how you treat others

It is not just the words you say

It is your mood swings

And the looks you give

I don’t know what the problem is

But it seems to me that you are in pain

And you are unable to cope

You take your pain out on others

And make them feel bad

So you can feel better

Jo Anne Kennedy

July 2019

Personal Hell

The awful memories

Which cause you pain

The images in your head

Which cannot be unseen

The noise of their curves

From the torture you caused

These are the things that haunt you

But you cannot walk away

You are sitting all alone

In your own personal hell

A hell which you created

You have only yourself to blame

Jo Anne Kennedy

July 2019

You Must Remember

You must remember

That I choose you

It was me that asked you

To come to me

I saw you and wanted you,

To be mine and only mine

To turn to me

And give me your heart

So if you choose to walk away

It will be your doing

As I would never push you away

Because you are too precious to me

I will always be waiting for you

To come back to me

I will grab you in an embrace

And never let you go

It is not about you

It is about us

Individuality is good

But connection is even better

Don’t think what they can do for me

Instead, what can you do for them?

Sometimes it is better to think

Of others before yourself

Life can be lonely

So it is important to reach out

To show love and respect for others

And see the smiles on their faces

Don’t do things for your own glory

It may make you happy for a moment

But it will quickly fade

Like the sun at the end of the day

Jo Anne Kennedy

July 2019

Need to Change

If you come back to me

Life will be different

As I freely forgive you

But you will need to change

Be a transformed person

In both heart and mind

You will need to submit to me

And recognise that it is me.

Who deserves all your love

I ask you to please,

Give me your life fully to me

And not look to others

For other people will hurt you

They will cause you to break

And to question yourself

They will bring you pain

And make you cry

And wonder why you are here

But I give you my whole heart

And promise to never leave you

And give you all my love

Because you are my all

You are the reason I live

For you, I gave a sacrifice

Jo Anne Kennedy

July 2019

You Deceived Me

I walked into the room

And saw you together

It broke my heart

As you had deceived me

You said you loved me

You gave me your life

But yet here you are

Cheating on me

I gave you my life

I trusted you

And I believed in you

But you cast me aside

What hurts the most

Is that I still love you

And despite this deception

I will never leave you

Don’t get me wrong

Your unfaithfulness angers me

It crushes me to the bone

That you would even do this to me

I am deserving of all of you

For you, it is a choice,

Will you return to me?

Or give your heart to another?

Jo Anne Kennedy

July 2019

Trust in the Plan

There are times in life

That we need to let go

To shed our burdens

And lighten our loads

It is impossible to do everything

To be in all places

And be there for everyone

As we are only one person

It may be hard to let go

As you say goodbye

And leave people wandering

Why have you gone away

But it is necessary

As if you don’t look after yourself

Then you are of no use

To those who truly need you

Don’t worry about reactions

And what people may think

Do what is best for you

And believe it’s the right action

Give yourself a break

Don’t second guess yourself

Believe in your decision

And trust in the plan

Jo Anne Kennedy

June 2019

Look at You

When I look at you

I see the pain in your eyes

And your aching heart

My heart breaks for you

I want to wrap my arms around you

And say everything will be ok

But I can’t do that

And I don’t know the future

And how it will turn out

But I pray for you

That your pain will lift

And your heart becomes lighter

I wish to see you smile

To see the glint in your eyes

And hear your laugh again

Jo Anne Kennedy

June 2019

Help

Help me be quick to listen

To actually hear the words

That are being said to me

Help me not to be dismissive

Of those talking to me

Or make them unloved

Help me to be slow to speak

To think of the words

Before I speak them

Help me to say the right thing

And not be disparaging

Or use offhand comments

Help me be slow to anger

To not answer back

With first thing in my head

Help me to think rationally

About every situation

And not get so defensive

Help me to protect my heart

From the words and actions of others

And not let them bring me down

Help me to love others

Even in the midst of hurt and pain

When all I want to do is hate

Help me to set an example

And show those who hurt me

The love than radiates from you

Jo Anne Kennedy

June 2019

Help Me to Listen

Help me to listen

To hear your word

To accept it

And to obey it

Help me to listen intently

And not half-heartedly

Let me hear every word

And fully take it in

Help me to listen

Not just with my ears

But also with my heart

And absorb the words of love

Help me respond properly

And not let me be deceived

By lies which enter my head

Help me hold onto the truth

Help me to hold the truth in my heart

And when I feel deflated

Let me come to you

To rest in your love

Jo Anne Kennedy

June 2019

The Fall

Today I decided

To go for a walk

But a barrier appeared

In the shape of a wall

 I began to climb

But on the other side

Disaster struck

I lost my footing

I think that my brain

Just though the ground was lonely

So it sent me flying

To give the ground a hug

Jo Anne Kennedy

April 2019

Feeling Free

It’s been a while

But it’s been good

Not seeing you

It has made me free

I don’t feel constricted

In what I do

I don’t feel watched

I feel free

But the other side of me

Is scared to see you

Wondering how you will react

And If you will speak to me

I don’t know why I care

Because you certainly, don’t

Or if you do

You have a funny way of showing it

Just let me go

And I will do the same

We need to be free

And live our lives

All contact will not be cut

As we will still see each other

So respect is needed

On how we treat one another

Jo Anne Kennedy

April 2019

Walk in Love

I went to walk in love

Towards the ones who hurt me

But I need your help

I cannot do it alone

To the one who left me

I want to show them love

To the ones who betrayed me

I want to show them love

To the one who mocked me

I want to show them love

To the one who broke me

I want to show them love

For holding onto the hurt

Holding onto the pain

Grieves me more than you

And makes my heart ache

I will learn to love you

To help my heart heal

And show others love

As perfect love drives out fear

Jo Anne Kennedy

April 2019

Learn from the Pain

You came into my life

And caused so much pain

My heart was broken

By your words and attitude

Your words cut me deep

But after I wallowed,

In my own self-pity

I woke up to reality

The words that you say

Are not true

Your actions toward me

Were full of hate

I have learned a lesson

That you were in my life

To help me see clearly

And to help me grow

You were in my life

To help me to learn

How to separate the wheat from the chaff

And learn from the pain

Jo Anne Kennedy

April 2019

The Cave

The black dog

Visits many

He is no stranger

To people’s homes

He maybe unwanted

But he doesn’t care

He just walks on in

Shaking his black tail

However, he is not alone

He always brings along with his friends

Shame and guilt

To weigh us down

We feel under pressure

Unable to cope

So it is time to retreat

Into our caves

Can the cave bring peace?

Oh how we wish

But no it doesn’t

Cos we are not alone

Wherever we go

Our new friends come too

Following us around

Like a big dark cloud

We wait for the cloud to burst

For the sun to break the skies

So we can leave the cave

And learn to smile again

March 2019

Freely Given

Grace

Not earned

Freely given

For us to receive

Grace

Never deserved

Just freely given

For us to enjoy

Grace

Brings hope

And is freely given

To the guilty ones

Jo Anne Kennedy

March 2019

Taboo

I know that I am not supposed to feel like this

I shouldn’t feel closed off

Or as if I am in darkness

Or sinking into an abyss

I shouldn’t feel like this

As it is considered a failure

To show your symptoms

And be vulnerable

Depression is a taboo subject

In the Christian community

Why are you depressed

Is Jesus not good enough for you

Christian’s shouldn’t be depressed

With Jesus in their lives

His love for us

Should make us filled with joy

So why the sad face

Why the lack of despair

Why are you hiding away?

Can you not cheer up?

I despair of this

Because if you read the Bible

Just turn to the Psalms

And listen to David

He struggled with life

He retreated to the cave

He called out in angst

He felt left behind

So if it is ok for David

It is ok for me

Because God treasured him

And God cherishes me

Jo Anne Kennedy

March 2019

Abyss

I am sinking

Into a great abyss

Can’t hold on

I go deeper down

But sometimes

I am at the surface

But then a wave comes

And takes me off balance

Putting me in danger

Of falling deeper down

With no way out

And then sometimes

I see a lifebuoy

And when I try to reach it

It slips away

Out of my grasp

And I just drown

Jo Anne Kennedy

March 2019

Where Are You?

You saw me in tears

Yet you walked away

Which cut me up

I decided to leave

And you just let me

Never giving me a second thought

I was already upset

But your actions hurt

And left me feeling hollow

For weeks now I have felt

Like something was up

And you distanced yourself from me

My thoughts are why,

And what have I done

As you weren’t like this before

You say have a caring heart

And have compassion for others

But I am not seeing it

You know I am in pain

And that life has been hard

But where are you?

Jo Anne Kennedy

February 2019

My Rock

You are my rock

Nothing fazes you

Nothing causes you to tumble

You are strong

You hold me up

In the times of darkness

You are stable

You will never leave

And your love will never break

Jo Anne Kennedy

February 2019

Help Me

Help me to refocus

My eyes need to be on you

And not on the world

Help renew my mind

So my thoughts are of the truth

And not the lies I am being told

Help me ignore the lies

And see the truth in you

That I am loved and cherished

Help me see the goodness

And not focus on the bad

Because that can be harmful

Help me realise I am not alone

And it doesn’t matter what people think

As you are always by my side

Help  fill my heart with joy

And let my soul be at peace

As I can’t live torn up anymore

Help me focus on you

And not on myself

As that isn’t healthy

Help me leave behind my limitations

And realise that with you anything is possible

                                            And that you are in complete control

Jo Anne Kennedy

February 2019

Right from the Start

From the beginning

You chose me

And you knew my name

You put the stars in space

And the planets in their orbit

Yet you know me by name

You made the sea

And you made the land

And you know who I am

Although you were busy

Putting the world together

I was still on your mind

What a feeling it is

To know that in everything you do

You are always thinking of me

That no matter what I do

You will always love me

As you did right from the start

Jo Anne Kennedy

January 2019

You Know Me

You are loving

You are compassionate

You are in control

You are sovereign

You gave me life

You have a plan for me

You knew me before I was born

You know my tastes

You know my personality

You know my strengths

You know my weaknesses

You have given me a purpose

You never forget me

You always know where I am

You have your hand on my life

Jo Anne Kennedy

January 2019

Welcome Home

I come to you as a broken child

Scared and ashamed

But you opened your arms

And wrapped them around me

You took my face into your hands

Looked me straight in the eyes

And said “welcome home”

You are now safe in my love

You took my brokenness

And all my flaws

And with your love and grace

You pieced me back together

All my thanks is to you

For saving me from myself

For taking me as you found me

And making me brand new

January 2019

Jo Anne Kennedy

One Step Ahead

You are always one step ahead

Putting the narrative into my story

Showing me the way to go

Even when I am now aware

Before I was born

You had everything planned

You opened up a couple’s heart

To welcome me into their lives

During times of difficulty

You were always there by my side

Knowing that all would be ok

Because you already knew I would survive

When exam results weren’t expected

I was upset and scared

But you had it all planned

As you took me out of my safe haven

You knew what you were doing

As I grew to be myself

In another city in another country

Forcing me to learn to live on my own

From there you helped me move

To the big smoke

Where heartache lay before me

But you were always there

A path always laid out for me

When jobs finished

Another one always appeared

Because you had gone before me

Then I was taken out of my comfort zone

When I moved to another continent

But it was there that I learned

How to embrace the different

It wasn’t a coincidence

That I moved back home

Because you knew what would happen

And that I would need family support

You are always one step ahead

When I was in need of a friend

You always had a plan

And someone was always there

When I needed a place of worship

You put me in the right place

No matter what country I was in

There was always a place for me

So now why do I have fears?

Because there really is no need

As you are always one step ahead

As the author of my story

Jo Anne Kennedy

December 2018

Done

I am done

Fed up with the backlash

And judgemental comments

You have no idea

What it’s like to live like this

Every day being a struggle

You say you know pain

And that you have to hide it

As life goes on

Yes life does go on

But sometimes you need to give in

And rest your weary body

You sound like a martyr

Saying that’s not possible for you

And that work needs to be done

But work can wait

You are not that important

Though you think you are

You may find it hard to believe

But life can function without you

No one is that special

Yes there may have been a time

Where I couldn’t function without you

But I’ve now seen the light

I am capable and strong

And can do life on my own

Without you holding my hand

It’s time to let go

I say for the millionth t time

But this time it is real

Let’s see how it goes

Because every time I walk away

You always come running

Jo Anne Kennedy

December 2018

Roam Free

You may be guilty

But I do not condemn

You are busted in two

But I believe in you

You are broken in pieces

But you are beloved

I will catch you

And will set you free

If you are hiding something

I give you pardon

You are not to feel judged

As I have set you free

Do not be bound to anything

As I have broken the chains

That has held you, prisoner,

And now you can roam free

Jo Anne Kennedy

Walk on Water

You walked on water

You calm the storm

You pour mercy out like rain

And give us underserved grace

You bring peace to our brokenness

And you reach out to us in love

And in a whispering voice

You promise to make all things new

Jo Anne Kennedy

December 2018

Imperfection

When you choose your friends

You didn’t pick the perfect

You looked out for the misfits

You saw the brokenness

Yet you still believed

In their total imperfection

You knew through the tears

That they would see the joy

And be a blessing to those around

You knew that in the brokenness

They could see far beyond

The thing that clouds their vision

You knew that in their imperfection

Beauty shone out through them

To bring joy to those around them

Jo Anne Kennedy

December 2018